Being Liked Is More Than Nice — It’s Essential
In every service job I’ve ever had—slinging drinks, serving tables, selling merchandise at a department store, and now dancing my ass off leading group fitness classes—one thing has always mattered most: being liked. Tips, commissions, class attendance, raises—you name it. They all followed that one simple rule. If people liked me, they came back. They bought more. They told their friends. And the facilities I worked for? They didn’t mind either. Being liked isn’t just about charm—it’s about connection. It’s what turns a good experience into a memorable one.
Two People Benefit When You’re Liked
In hospitality or fitness—or any people-first business—being liked is a win for both sides. When guests or members like you, it elevates the brand you represent. A friendly bartender makes a bar feel more inviting; a welcoming trainer makes a gym feel like home. I’ve seen it firsthand. In group fitness, if the energy’s off, people feel it. But when you show up with warmth, humor, and authenticity, the class shifts. The whole environment glows. Likability isn’t superficial—it’s an energy exchange that boosts everyone in the room.
Three Ways to Be More Likable
Be genuinely present. Whether you’re behind a bar or on a bike, people can tell when you’re truly with them and not just “doing your job.”
Radiate positive energy—but make it real. It’s not about faking happy. It’s about bringing your best, most grounded energy to meet people where they are.
Pay attention to nuance. Some want conversation, others just want to sweat and vibe. Read the room and respond naturally.
In every role I’ve had, I learned likability isn’t about performing—it’s about listening, adapting, and letting your authentic self take the lead.
Calm Confidence: The True Foundation of Likability
True story: when I was serving tables years ago, Jennifer Lopez and her then-husband Marc Anthony came in. I just about had a heart attack, but I let calm confidence take over. I sat beside her, trying to act natural, and we started chatting about this beautiful fragrance I was smelling—only to realize it was my own cologne! We laughed, and it turned into a genuine, human moment. It wasn’t perfect, but it was real, and that’s what connected us.
That moment—and many since—taught me what I now teach in my workshop, The Calm Code. Being liked isn’t about people-pleasing—it’s about grounded energy and confidence that others can feel. Calm confidence is magnetic; it says, “I’m here, I’m human, and I’ve got you.” In group fitness and in life, that presence makes people trust you, follow you, and remember how you made them feel.
If you’re ready to strengthen your own presence, connect more authentically, and lead with calm confidence, learn more about my Calm Code Workshop and coaching offerings on my Work With Me page.